Bramhall Rangers 6 Eat My Goal 5

"The black players at this club lend the side a lot of skill and flair, but you also need white players in there to balance things up and give the team some brains and some common sense." - Crystal Palace chairman Ron Noades, speaking in 1991.

The team news for this week’s game wasn’t confirmed until a few hours before KO, with Shiz announcing he could make it. This meant 6 Rangers were available for the game with Belly in goal, Nev, Pie, Peter and Mini making up the rest.

Eat My Goal, who had enjoyed a big win against Cheadle, had leapfrogged the Rangers in the table but had been beaten in a close game in the last meeting 13-9. They had no subs and it proved to be a close game once again. Unfortunately Mini and Shiz will have to wait to experience the 5th generation pitches as the game was played on the knee-shredding sandpaper.

Rangers started poorly, falling behind by two goals, both orchestrated by Peter. One involved a Peter suicide dance which was inevitable turned in, the second was a poorly executed back pass which the team could not recover from.

However, after Rangers had settled from the initial unrest, Mini gave them a life line, shooting low past the keeper. The defence had sorted out the problems (by banishing Peter further up the pitch!) and were coping with the attacks. The pace of the game was slow, Eat My Goal needing to conserve energy and the Rangers preferring a slower game. Mini managed to pull the game level, some good battling up front let to a shot by Peter, which came back of the keeper. Mini was awake to this and got to the ball first to half volley at pace past the keeper, taking a blow on the foot for his troubles. After restoring parity Rangers had the confidence to push on.

Truth be told the Rangers made hard work of breaking down EMG. Consistently poor communication led to Rangers players tackling one another, going to the same man or getting in the way of one another clearance. Only for some great saves by Belly were they not punished for this. Belly took a painful blow to the fingers after a very literal finger tip save of great quality.

Shiz, determined to continue his good run of goal scoring (4 in 4) was finding space down the channels but more often that not the rebounds off the boards were just out of reach or finished poorly by the onrushing attackers. Peter was trying to get in the game but couldn’t find enough room to pull the trigger. Nev was Nev, going in where it hurts but also relieving pressure on Belly with good long passes and composure on the ball. Pie, suffering with a woman’s cold, was quieter than usual and couldn’t get in the game as much as usual. A couple of chances came his way but were blazed over or wide.

Peter did get a goal before half time and the teams finished the half at 4-4. In the second half the Rangers started poorly again. Mini was responsible for conceding a free kick near the edge of the area which was not defended well allowing EMG to profit. However, as the game went on Rangers were able to punish the tiring EMG to get back in the lead. Good pressure on the defenders led to one running through the area and then subsequently being forced into the area by a combination of Mini and Peter. Mini dispatched the penalty.

With more and more gaps opening up Rangers hoped to kill the game but poor final passes or finishing meant EMG were still in the game. A tangle of legs sent Shiz sprawling when seemingly through on goal, Nev took a powerful strike in the chest from Mini and Pie picked up his quota of injuries for the game which meant he had to hobble off before the end. With the game evenly balanced Mini drove down the line and cut inside to fire a right footer into the bottom corner. This proved to be the winning goal; however, he should also have sealed the win with a couple of later chances. One half volley from half way nearly vexed the keeper and a one on one saw Mini’s attempted chip just reached by the keeper. Nev would have been in for a better pass from Mini and Shiz had a long range effort squirt wide.

In the final seconds the ref awarded a strange free kick to EMG. A shot was well saved by Belly with his legs and the ball ballooned into the air coming to rest at Mini’s feet for a counter attack. Seemingly taking leave of his senses the ref blew for a free kick to EMG for over head height. Thankfully, this was snuffed out and the whistle was blown soon after.

It was like wading through treacle for the Rangers, but in the end the extra man counted and Rangers recorded their only double of the season to move off the bottom of the league. Northern Canaries next week and the Rangers will want to give a better account of themselves, than the previous meeting. Looking into Division 5, there is no chance of meeting Slim Jims next season (HOORAH!) as they look on course to stay up or go up, and new teams Running Flush and Torpedo emissions currently find themselves in the relegation zones.

Final score – Bramhall Rangers 6 Eat My Goal 5
Goals – Mini (5), Peter (1)

Peter suicide dance – 2

*BTW I can’t access the archive on the blog – any ideas?*

*Reminder – Mini/Charlotte house shindig on the 10th March 2007 – THE social event of the year!*

Updated Fixtures and Results

I've (finally) updated all scores, line-ups and scorers of the matches so far. You know where to find it.

If anyone can confirm who scored the 2 goals in the game against Oz Tornados a couple of weeks ago please let me know. I think Mini got them both, but not sure.

Bramhall Rangers 3 Thirsty FC 4

It’s becoming more and more common in football these days that due to cold, wet and frosty winter’s clubs replace their football pitches. This season alone has seen Bolton and Chelsea do it in the Premiership, and Birmingham in the Championship were fined after they replaced their pitch but it didn’t settle enough and their game was called off.

For the past two weeks Powerleague have been hinting at replacing their pitches with a ‘5th generation Astroturf’ pitch. Anyone who has played on Pitch One at Powerleague knows how needed this has been!

Yesterday a small select group of the Rangers players were given their first chance to test this new surface, their game against Thirsty FC was moved from Pitch 6, which was one of the old style surfaces, to pitch 4 with this new 5th generation stuff. It looked like very dark grass. Running out my first thoughts were it was a little too long, and as such it would hold the ball up more. We were advised from the team playing on the pitch before hand that the ball didn’t run as quickly, and that long range shooting was a lot more difficult. But it was exciting times, and the team was looking forward to playing on the new surface. Nev expressed a desire to try out the new surface with a sliding tackle, however would he get his chance during the game, despite the move still being illegal?

As mentioned it was a small select group that were available for the match against Thirsty. Belch returned to the goal, Nev shook off an earlier in the week knee injury to play and Pie made his return outfield. Shiz, only a couple of days after a visit to a sports physiotherapist to check on his odd length legs, was also playing along with Peter. No subs, however Thirsty also turned up with just the 5, and so we were away.

The first half was quite a close cagey affair, Belch was standing up well in his return to the Rangers goal and the outfield players were defending courageously. A few chances fell their way too, however none were taken.
Halfway through the first half though, and Thirsty got a strike of luck. A powerful shot from quite a wide angle went straight at Belch managed to push the ball up and over the bar. Only he had misjudged where he was stood in his goal area, and instead of the ball ending up behind to goal and away to safety, it dropped down into the net. It was an unfortunate slice of bad luck on behalf of Belch and the Rangers, but they didn’t let their heads drop.

As the half was drawing to a close Rangers pushed on. Pete crashed a shot against the post, before a second shot from him was pushed away by the keeper, into the path of the oncoming Shiz, who calmly dispatched it into the back of the net.

It was deserved for the Rangers who had played well in the first half. Half time came, and it was only 1-1, probably one of the lowest scoring halves we have had. We collected ourselves, caught our breath and just encouraged ourselves to keep going, playing as we had been.

As is the Rangers way though, for some reason the spell just after half time at the beginning of the second we seem to always concede. This game was no difference, and we were quickly 3 goals behind as Thirsty took control. Despite these three goals the Rangers were still playing and battling well. That was all that Thirsty had to show, and for the remainder of the game it was the Rangers battling to get back. That’s not to say the Rangers had it all their own way – Belch was playing well in net, and the defending was of a pretty high quality.

Pete fired a second goal for the Rangers as they kept pushing, and shortly afterwards he crashed a second shot against the post.

Then Nev decided it would be time to attempt his sliding tackle, when as one of the Thirsty players was getting away from him he lunged in. Incredibly, no foul was given and the game continued. However Nev showed after the game that the new surface still causes some damage to your leg, despite not being quite so hard as the previous surface…

Anyway the game was ebbing and flowing, and then Pete had another shot spilled by the keeper right into the path of Shiz who once again calmly placed the ball home. That was 4-3, and there were 5 minutes to go…

Rangers pushed on, this goal seemed to give them a new burst of life while Thirsty seemed to be tiring really quickly. We pushed on, Pie smashed a shot against the inside of the post, and it seemed like it wouldn’t be long before we were level. Unfortunately we just ran out of time, the final whistle went and it was all over. To be honest I think had we played another 5 minutes we would have got another goal, and then who knows…

But it was a great performance by the 5 Rangers boys, and the new surface was definitely a bonus. I think it will certainly benefit our game. The ball runs a lot slower and I think that will be to our benefit.

Final score: Bramhall Rangers 3 Thirsty FC 4

Goals: Shiz (2), Peter (1)

Oz Tornados 14 - Bramhall Rangers 2

No-one wanted to write the report this week. And once again i wasnt there. But this was the "report" that pie sent me


"Crap. 14-2 we lost. Utter rubbish" though. The worst we’ve played for a long time. Piggy was woeful, Mini was poor, Shiz had an awful first half, I didn’t play well in nets…in fact the only one who played anywhere near well was Nev."

Suffice to say the rangers were not happy with their defeat. Last time we faced them, i ended up in hospital! But you can check in the history to see the reasons!

Seeing as everyone's so down hearted, i thought i'd stick up the Markstock 2006 UFC battle between piggy and mr T. I figured you may as well see what we do in our spare time seeing as football isnt one of our best past-times! Enjoy!







Rascle McPherson

Arsene Wenger Teaches Us 5-A-Side

http://home.skysports.com/articlefp.aspx?hlid=428633&channel=nike

Mini sent this out by e-mail towards the end of last year sometime. I don't know if anybody watched any of it but I held on to it, and just remembered today about it.

I was watching it, and it was interesting some of the points he raised. Mainly that there are a number of things you can work on for 5-a-side football (including physical stuff) but the most important are movement and vision, along with speed. Now the speed thing he says there is not a lot you can do to improve it - you are born with it or you aren't, though you can improve your reactionary speed.

However interestingly I think the area where we are particularly poor is the movement aspect of our games. Mr Wenger says that if your always moving, there is generally always an outlet so therefore you keep possession better. If you have possession then the opposition don't they can't score. Its something Mini in particular has been saying for a long time, and something in particular that I noticed last week while in net. A distinct lack of movement from players, quite often it was only either Shiz or Nev who made a run to get into space or free space for the opposition player.

Another point that I found interesting is that of the improtant skills above that Arsene suggests, Big Pete is poor at at least two of the (vision and movement) and should and could be better at the other (his speed). Says a lot too me really. Now Pete I know you respect Arsene Wenger a lot, so I hope you take on board what I am saying here on his behalf.

This does go for everyone else too, though on the whole they are nowhere near as lacking in these as Pete is. The movement one though is something that I feel in particularly we should be ramming home and improving next game...

Thanks for listening guys!

And thanks to Arsene for giving us some advice!! :)

Bramhall Rangers 8 - Puss in Boots 11

*distinct lack of football quote*

The Rangers lined up on a chilly February evening to battle against Puss in Boots. Last time we'd beaten them was an automatic win in august 2006. And this season they had already battered the rangers 17-4. Having lost 3 on the bounce, and a particularly painful loss to cheadle last week, Rangers wanted to taste blood again.

The team lined up as best it could. Our ringer wasn't able to make it, Mr T is still in retirement, and Rascle was too poor to play! And as such wielded the camera for the highlights reel. As he spent 3 hours editing the mere 12 minutes of video, this is a V brief write up! Piggy, Mini, Pie (in nets), Belly (outfield), shiz and Nev saddled up for the task in hand,

And it couldn't have been a better start! 6 minutes saw 3 goals for the rangers with no response! The goals were well taken too, with belly turning on a sixpence for the first of the game, Mini stabbing in well from close range, and Shiz following up with a deft rebound. The whole attitude to the first half was good. Good passing, lots of shots, and Pie was aptly handling goal duties. The First PIB goal had to come and it was a soft one. Piggy was indecisive with his shot and softly rolled it to the keeper. The Rangers were happy in control, and allowed the PIB striker to run right through the team and slot past Pie. After this we were unlocked. Piggy manged to get a goal in the first half, but PIB replied with 4 in quick succession. Half time was 6-4 to PIB

Second half started promisingly! Piggy shooting with power in the first 15 seconds to net his 2nd of the match! Then, despite good saves from pie, PIB got 3 in RAPID succession. Piggy and mini managed to grab a few more each to both complete hat tricks, but PIB went on to score more goals to take their tally to 11.

It was disappointing to not win this one, as we'd started so well. But once again fitness was key at the end of the match. Subbing would be left too long, and then players would be subbing every 30 seconds, meaning no-one had a break really. Belly was making a nuisance of himself outfield, Nev was solid, and Shiz was once again trying his luck everywhere. Piggy, although yelled at for his silly dancing and indecisiveness in front of the net, did well to tackle in defence and then run up to score. And mini hit the woodwork at least 5 times!

Rangers can once again feel proud in this defeat that they battled as well as they could, but will come away feeling blue at the knowledge they could have won.


Belly 1, Shiz 1, Mini 3, Piggy 3.




First Half



Second Half


And yes.. it is 3am...



Rascle